Have you ever felt stuck in your Lenten
practices? Attempts that didn’t lead to a change of heart and ongoing
conversion? Several years back I came across a very interesting Lenten resolution written by Keith Bierraum. One “Lent I
gave up my right to be offended and to take offense. Every day, practically
every hour, I blundered my way into realizing how much time, effort and energy
is take up with defending myself and exacting whatever retribution is most
easily available. I have given too much energy on feeling wronged or feeling
righteous toward anyone who has let me down or disagreed with me. This led to
letting go of my right to be correct and to correct others because I am right.
What a relief.”
Though exacting retribution seems way out of
the ordinary (or is it?), I believe Keith’s resolution is a worthy
consideration. My experience suggests that most/many of us know firsthand what he
is saying. Much of life’s precious time
can be swallowed up in feeling offended and nursing past hurts which leads to destruction
of one’s quality of life and absorbs too many thoughts. Awareness, humility,
discipline and above all prayer become the ingredients for shedding the need to
hold the grudge.
After pondering Keith’s experience, I am reminded
of Luke’s parable of cleaning the house to get rid of one devil only to have
seven more return to the empty house. (Luke11: 24 -25) In the decision not
to take offense at remarks deemed hurtful or mean, it is of import to decide how
to “replace” the time spent resenting, bemoaning or begrudging etc. with open
hearted prayer, and engagement in behaviors that promote well-being and growth.
The Church’s ancient plea to Lenten
discipline calls us to prayer, fasting and almsgiving. These praxis offers specific
help to the seeker. All three offer opportunities to go out of self for the
sake of deepening one’s relationship with God and God’s people. Think about what
a beautiful world this could be if we nurtured and practiced forgiveness and
loving-kindness.
Sr. Aileen Bankemper, OSB
