We recently hosted a Day of Reflection entitled “The
Mystery of God and Suffering.” The speaker, Rev. Kenneth Overberg, SJ, explored
the many ways humans view suffering and whether suffering is something that a
loving God wants for us and from us. The content of Fr. Overberg was
stimulating and more complex than I can spell out in this brief post but I want
to share some of my reflections on the day.
I
became aware of how much the phrase Offer It Up is deeply embedded in the way
I think and act. I frequently use the phrase in self talk, and as I
thought about what it means to me, I discovered it holds many different
messages for me.
If I
offer my difficulties, inconveniences, troubles, problems, hassles and even
suffering to God, why do I think God wants them? What does the idea of offering
those things up say about my image of God? Does God have a cupboard where all
the things I offer up are stored and eventually act as credits for my salvation?
Is the God to whom I offer up it a God who keeps a ledger of all my
transgressions and voids one of them when I offer something up?
That
image of God is not my image of God. My experience and image of God is a God of
love who loves and cares for us more than the most loving and caring human
being. My God wants what is best for me more than my parents, friends, teachers
and those who wish me well in any way.
So
what I do mean when I say to myself, Offer It Up. In some cases I mean, “Get
over it. You’re not the center of the universe.”—especially when I’m being
inconvenienced or am impatient. Sometimes I mean, “Stop complaining. Stop
whining. It's not that bad.” Sometimes I mean, “Come on. This is a good thing for you do or
experience. You will be a better person for it.” And sometimes I’m saying, “This
really hurts, God. Help me get through it. Let’s talk about it”
I
don’t know if I need to stop saying to myself, Offer it up. I think it is my shorthand
for other speeches to myself depending on the circumstance. And perhaps it is
my reminder to myself to take the events of my life to our loving God and
strengthen our relationship. Perhaps I can work toward saying to myself and God what I really mean instead of using Offer It Up.
Sr. Deborah Harmeling, OSB
