Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Life Lessons from My Mother

       When the schedule for us bloggers came out this summer I saw my turn for today and I thought I would write about my new position as treasurer and how I am adjusting to not teaching after 40+ years.  That thought changed on August 1. 
       On August 1, my mother went into surgery for a routine procedure at 1:30 in the afternoon, something that several sisters had had with great results.  At 2:00 the nurse came out to tell my brother and me that they couldn't finish the procedure and that the doctor would talk to us. We thought that they would just do the procedure a couple days later. When the doctor came out of the room the chaplain was with him. We knew that this was not a normal problem with her procedure.   My mother’s heart had stopped and she had been revived. She was unconscious and on a ventilator.
       Naturally we were shaken but called our sister and brother who came to the ICU right away. After several hours watching Mom struggle even with the ventilator we made the decision to remove it. While we knew this was her wish it was a traumatic decision for us. She was able to breathe on her own overnight but with no hope of recovery. She was moved to hospice and lived for about four hours. She peacefully breathed her last in the early hours of August 3.
       I have learned so much since her death and her funeral. The support and love of so many friends, community members and family in the days that followed was overwhelming. I received letters from former neighbors and Villa Madonna alumni, from former Villa parents and Mom’s friends whom I had never met.
       Those who knew her praised her kindness and generous spirit. She would have been humbled to hear their comments. She didn't live her life to be honored; she lived it to be a good person and live the teachings of love she learned from her earliest days in her Catholic family and school.
       Another lesson that stays with me especially is that “we never know what each day will bring.” I can only hope that I will have lived my life as well as Mom and will be ready when that day comes. As we finished clearing out Mom’s apartment, my brother said, “I can’t believe that it’s over.” Her earthly life may be over, but Mom lives on in our memories and in the lives we now live as she taught us. 
       Sr. Nancy Kordenbrock, OSB

3 comments:

  1. Very sorry to hear of your loss. It must have took incredible strength to write this post. Reading this brought my back to the day when my father passed and how overwhelming that experience was for me.

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  2. Dear Sr. Nancy,
    I am so very sorry to hear about your Mother's recent death. My sympathy and prayers are with you. Reading your blog on Sept. 17 was such a coincidence for me. My own Mom died on Sept. 17, 2011, and many of her end-of-life experiences were so much like your Mother's! She too had heart problems; and after a second heart attack, she was revived, was conscious, and was on a ventilator. There was no hope of recovery, and so, struggling just as you did, my sisters and I had to make the decision to remove the ventilator. Mom struggled for 5 more days and finally died on Sept. 17. We were at peace, and so was she. With sympathy, Mary Margaret (Heile) Cole

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  3. So sorry for your loss, Sr. Nancy. I didn't know your mom, but she must have been a wonderful woman. She raised wonderful kids!

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